Barbara's Random Thoughts

Monday, September 24, 2007

I'll find you when I think I'm out of time

A dear friend mentioned the Jars of Clay song "The Eleventh Hour" to me a couple of years ago, when we were both thinking through some big transitions and decisions in both of our lives. I'm on the brink of more such transitions and decisions right now, and the lyrics have been on my mind a lot lately.

I've got seven weeks left here. SEVEN! That's insane. Everyone is asking me what my plans are for next year. And I wish I knew for sure. I think I was expecting to have more clarity by this point. I have this grand vision statement that I'm working on. I'm excited about it. But even so, it's a broad thing and doesn't exactly say "here's what Barbara will be doing in January 2008," which is what everyone seems to want to know. Hey, I want to know that, too.

I feel like I have some sense of where God might be leading, small inklings of what could be ahead and where I'm supposed to be. But right now that's all it is. Just a sense. I keep hearing God telling me to trust, that this will turn out well. I want to know how and what and where and when. I feel like I'm running out of here is flying past and I feel like I can't grab on to anything. But I'm finding comfort in the knowledge that God speaks even in the eleventh hour...

The Eleventh Hour - Jars of Clay

Trace the shape of my heart
Till it becomes more familiar to your eyes
I’ve been lost without you, cold without your love
It’s taken days and nights to make me realize

Rescue me from hanging on this line
I won’t give up on giving you the chance to blow my mind
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by
I’ll find you when I think I’m out of time

Take the place of my heart,
Till I become a stranger to my life
I’ve been down without you, wrong without your love
In time will I be what you’re thinking of?

Rescue me from hanging on this line
I won’t give up on giving you the chance to blow my mind
Let the eleventh hour quickly pass me by
I’ll find you when I think I’m out of time

I’ve been wrong without you, cold without your love
In time will I be what you’re thinking of?
| posted by Barbara | 12:34 PM |

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Dangit, Arthur.


- Those who are tagged need to write on their own blog eight random facts about themselves.
- They need to post these rules.
- At the end of the post, they need to tag some people by listing their names.

I NEED to, do I? Well, then.

Some of these are things you people already pretty much know...but hey.

1. I had blond hair until I was about four years old. I'm partially convinced it darkened to brown because we moved away from Del Mar (and the beach and the sun) to England (and the clouds and the rain) when I was three.

2. I used to have an English accent. I grew up attending English schools, where all my friends were British. I had an English accent at school and an American accent at home, and switched between the two totally unconsciously. It freaked my mom out when she'd hear me chatting away to my school friends.

3. My parents/family, at various times during my childhood, managed to lose me in three different countries. They always found me again, and as the stories go, I never really missed them.

4. I'm a youngest child, but I don't really act like one. I have more oldest/only child tendencies due to my siblings being 6 and 8 years older than me.

5. When annoying people ask me why I don't have a boyfriend/why I'm not married yet, I like to tell them that the boys don't like me because I'm so fat. Someday this will get me in trouble.

6. I can say: "Not if you were the last man on earth" in Italian--an invaluable skill, to be sure. Perhaps there is some correlation between this and #5.

7. Every time I've gone to Rome (ages 8, 15, 18, and 28), I've thrown a coin into the Trevi Fountain. This is supposed to ensure your return to Rome. It's working for me so far.

8. I alphabetize CDs by artist and movies by title, and I categorize my books and alphabetize by author within those categories. There's actually more to it than that, but I'll spare you. This type of compulsion carries over into other areas as well. You can only imagine.

I really don't feel the NEED to tag anyone. Rather, I feel the need to go and be somewhat productive for the next hour instead of messing around online.


| posted by Barbara | 2:05 PM |

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Proposal of the Day

Chatting with a friend I haven't talked to in years:

Me (referring to McLaren's New Kind of Christian): In addition, I hated his pseudo-fictional narrative style
Him: hahahaha
for saying that
i will tell you this
i am a married man
happily married
i love lindsey a lot
if she didnt exist
i would ask for your hand right here and now


| posted by Barbara | 7:37 PM |